Forgotten
by Sagaa.l0veer
Summary: Bella told Edward her feelings. He didnt feel the same way. She gets into a car accident and taking the memories from her past. The pain is now silenced but she doesnt recognize anyone. How will she fare when she returns to Forks? R&R E/B
1. Chapter 1

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!

**June 24. 8:32 p.m**.

Pain.A four letter word to describe the worst emotion to be felt. What is the meaning of pain? The dictionary says physical suffering, emotional distress, something that irks and annoy. But the one that pops out the most is punishment. Did God give me heartbreak as punishment?

For all the times I lied to my parents when I was younger and lusted over a boy that wasn't mine. Was this the punishment? The dictionary described my condition perfectly. I lost my appetite and my mind kept taking me back to when he rejected me. These images annoyed me. But if this was the only way to remember him I would gladly take it. I knew I couldn't make the day go away. I couldn't stop myself from telling him what I felt. But I could stop myself from forgetting.

Edward Cullen. The name alone made my heart beat faster and the blood to course through my veins. I hated my reaction. The man broke my heart for godsake and I just cant control my emotions. I hated that. With one look, Edward Cullen took all of my control.

I remembered the first time I saw him. I had just moved to Forks and it was my junior year. I was going to school in the smallest town in the world. Well to me it was. Of course they knew everyone's business. And to make it worst, I was Chief Swan's daughter. Oh goodie. The rain was becoming unbearable and I easily missed my home in Arizona.

But all those thoughts went away once I saw Edward.

His bronze hair and green eyes easily stuck out from the student body. I was like a snake in my chamers trance. We immediately became best friends. I made other friends with Alice and Emmett Cullen. The little pixie and the giant teddy bear. An odd pair of siblings, but Edward balanced them out. Jasper and Rosalie Hale were also good friends. Also the significant others of Emmett and Alice.

Edward and I hung out together all the time. I was very aware I was falling in love with him. Alice and Rose already knew and told me to say what I feel. And me being the idiot I am, I did. Little did I know, our relationship would switch status. And not in the way I would call beneficial.

He just wanted to be "friends." At first we sort of managed, but then he was in a relationship with Tanya. I couldn't bear to see this, so instead of wasting time with the Cullens, I know had the lamest social life to be seen in existence. When the summer hit, I rushed back to Phoenix. Alice and Rose would understand. Edward could have a happy life without a best friend who hopelessly loves him.

And now I was taking a late night stroll. My hand was tracing the newly made wound on my left wrist. My mind had gone so crazy, I had cut myself. It was my only resort to relieving the pain. Something to take my mind away from the heartbreak. The cut was a bit deep probably needed a stitch or two, but I didn't care anymore. What was the point of living with a broken heart?

I had landed myself near a park by my mother's house. There was only one streetlight and it was directed towards the swings in the middle of the vacant park. I had to admit it was horror movie waiting to happen, but I really didn't give a damn. I walked toward the swing in my oversized hoodie. There was a light breeze. I recognized the phase of the moon as Waning Gibbous Moon. It had its circular shape but it wasn't complete; just like me.

I let my mind wander; hoping I get an escape from the Edward that was in my mind. I gave up saying there was no use. I walked back to my mother's place. She must be worried. I crossed the street not even checking for cars. Not one had passed since I was walking. My feet came in contact with the sidewalk.

I looked up to see that there was no need to cross it. The turn was on the other side. I lightly jogged back. This road was rather wide. And that's when I notice it.

The light was becoming brighter by each second. I was shocked in my place. I could see the guy now. His eyes were wide and panicked. I barely registered the car hitting my legs with great force and leaving me to fall frontwards. The last thing I register is my head hitting the windshield.

**July, 1. 10:32 p.m**.

Beep, Beep. What is that annoying sound? My eyes flutter open. I look around. White plain walls are what take up my vision. I hear a gasp and I whip my head around to the sound. I immediately regret it. My head is pounding. A middle aged lady is what my mind registers. She had short blonde hair and dark, blue eyes. Her face is comforting and welcoming. But as much as I look at her, I don't know who she is.

"Who are you?" I ask. Her facial expression changes and she takes a deep breath as if she was told this might happen. Her hand goes to my mahogany locks and she runs her hand through it. _A motherly gesture_, my mind registers.

"I am Renee, your mother," she whispers. My eyes grow wide. I try to rack my brain for any memories of a mother and that's when I know. I cant find anything about my past. It seems things that I need to know are in here. But my memories and past are gone.

Not a minute later a dark haired guy with hazel eyes and a white coat walks in. He has a small smile on his face.

"Hello Bella, welcome back," he says, as if I came home from an Alien planet. "Do you know where you are?" I shake my head no.

"You are in a hospital. You were in a car accident." _A hospital is a place for the sick._ My mind tells me. It seems that with every words my mind speaks to me in some way to make me understand my surroundings and the conversation. I nod my head in understanding. He keeps talking explaining my injuries and what had happened for the seven days I had not woken up.

"Do you remember anything?" The doctor's voice is patient. I shake my head no. The woman who claims to be my mother gives me a reassuring squeeze. I forgot she was there.

"It seems that you have a type of amnesia that is very rare, It is so rare that there is no name for it yet. Your memories and past have seemed to erase. But we do not know if the things you have been taught, such as things in school have been erased as well," He ranted. He kept informing me that doctors will be coming to seem me because my condition is so rare. No one knew if my memories were going to come back.

"And one more thing. We found a cut on your wrist that was rather new. It seems that you have done it. Do you know why you did it?" The doctor's voice was questioning. I shook my head no and he nodded. My newly known mother walked outside my room with the doctor. I let my mind to wander. My hand traced the scar that was on my right wrist.

A troubling thought was registered in the back of my mind. I had finally got the relief I had wanted.


	2. Chapter 2

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!

I had spent the rest of the summer in the hospital. Doctors were coming in and out of my room to have their own take at my condition. I felt like an animal at the petting zoo. I was rarely comfortable. I had learned that I forget things very easily. Like names of things and so on.

Charlie Swan, my supposed father, had visited me. I was going to live with him. Apparently I had lived their before and doctors believed I would recover my past memories. I would take weekly visits to the therapist. Because of the cut on my wrist, they were worried that a memory from my past would trigger me to do it again. This scar gave me unwanted attention.

I was going to meet my therapist and his son today. Apparently that son and I went to the same school. I wondered if I would recognize him, but my doctor said most likely not. The son was just returning from boarding school.

**Sept. 1. 9:46 am**

I woke up in the hospital again. I hated this place. I couldn't walk around because my legs and ribs had broken. I was trapped. And I hated every minute of it. I was glad that my school in Forks would be starting soon and that meant I would be going to the place I might have called home. I looked around. It was empty; like me. With no memories, I didn't know what I liked or what I did for fun. I was completely lost in life and for some reason that scared me.

I had recently found out I had trust issues. For some reason, I refused some odd number of therapists from getting inside my head, as they put it. Even the expression made me a little wary. I felt like they wanted to manipulate me and I didn't want them too. I wanted to get out of here, so I could experience things for the first time again.

My thoughts were interrupted when i saw the nurse walk up to me with a tray that had my breakfast on it. My doctor told me that I was getting food from the outside of the hospital, so my mind could register what it likes and doesn't like. I was grateful; I heard that the hospital food was pretty awful. Even though the numerous doctors here made me uncomfortable, the nurses were really nice. We would talk about things between their shifts, but it was mostly about them.

I ate my breakfast in peace. Apparently I had not eaten that much before this all happened. I had put on a good amount of weight; not that I could see myself. The hospital gown wasn't what I called flattering.

The door opened and my doctor walked in with some unfamiliar faces.

"Hey Bella," the doctor said, "This is the therapist that you will be seeing in Forks. His name is Dr. Alex Howard and this is his son, Austin." They smiled warmly at me except Austin. His face was expressionless. He was really good looking. He had dark brown hair and blue eyes. He was really tall, but toned. His father was a much older version of him. They had the same hair but Dr. Howard's were hazel. Something was different about this therapist. He didn't give me the creepy eye as my mind had put it. All of them I had just gave me this look that made me feel like they wanted me in their control. This one didn't. I could tell he was willing to listen to anything I was thinking. To help me interpret the things I would be experiencing.

I looked at Austin. He looked at me as if he were intrigued. I hadn't said a word yet and he was looking like this.

I nodded and the doctor left me in the room with the two of them. proceeded to tell me about himself. This was different. All the other ones would try to get every detail that went through my mind since I had woken up from the accident. He would share family stories and when I asked a question about something or an object that my mind couldn't picture, he would describe it to me. Austin was really quiet the whole time.

I actually liked this therapist. He made me comfortable, but I couldn't tell him what it is like for me just yet. Even though it may seem not a big deal to other people to share how they feel about something, it is for me. This amnesia is very rare and people want to know what you feel like when you wake up and to me that information is very rare.

The therapist and his son left. But something was different in the son's face. He gave me a small smile when he was leaving. I gave him one back.

The days passed with other visits with my new therapist and his son. He would use different techniques every once in a while. He wanted me just to express how I felt about everything. He often left me and Austin alone. I thought it was good idea since I would be starting school and to have one friend that I will actually remember. We talked about different things. He was really guarded, I had noticed. I was determined to break those walls. We would walk around the hospital; me on crutches or in the wheel chair. We were becoming the best of friends.

Whenever I would look at something and ask what it was, he would answer. He was very patient with me and I was grateful.

**Sept. 6. 2:24 pm**

Today we were heading toward the airport. Tomorrow was the first day of school for Austin and me. I wondered if I had any friends. And if I did, what did I do? Did they know my interests? I only wanted to find me. I wanted to find who I am. And for some reason my mind kept telling me Forks was the place. We were now landing in Seattle. I only had one suitcase. They were going to let me look around to see what I liked and what I didn't like. And how different it was from the old me.

Alex and Austin walked towards the car that they had left in the parking garage. I went into the back seat and Austin followed. He wrapped me up in his arms. I gladly leaned in. For some reason, I wanted to feel secure. I was learning new things all over again and I just wanted to have my protector.

I saw the Fork's welcome sign. That had not triggered memories. I breathed out a sigh a relief. There was a part of my mind that told me that I wouldn't want to know about my past. That I would be screaming for another car to hit me. My heart told me that I should welcome the memories if they do come. That it would be the only way.

The only way to what? To find myself? My mind was kicking into overdrive and frankly

I didn't want to deal with this right now. Austin rubbed soothing circles into my back. It calmed me. Alex pulled up to what I think was Charlie's house. We all got out and I walked to the front door. I spotted a cruiser in the driveway. I knocked and the door swung open.

A pair of arms wrapped around me and I hugged back. It was Charlie. I found out Charlie wasn't a man of many words and I come to realize I was okay with that. Austin and Alex walked in. Charlie showed us to my room. I was still on my crutches. They sat my suitcase down and Austin came up to me and smile. He hugged me.

"I'll see you tomorrow. I'm coming to pick you up for school," He whispered. We were always hugging or holding hands. This was our friendship and I didn't understand why other people would give us funny looks. I nodded and we said goodbye one more time before he left.

I fell asleep tracing the scar on my wrist and fell into a dreamless sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT

**(IF YOU GUYS WANT TO SEE THE CLOTHES, CARS, HOMES, AND CAST OF ANY OF MY STORIES IT IS ON MY PROFILE.)**

**Sept. 7. 6:50 am**

I wake up to what I now know is my alarm clock. I hit the snooze button and went to go take a shower. Before I left to go to Forks, my mom took me different samples of shampoo. I had a weird fascination with the strawberry one and apparently I liked it too before the accident happened. I step out of the shower and head to my room to get dress. My mom also packed me some new clothes that were fairly simple.

I put on a black shirt. I think it is called a tank top with a gray sweater that has writing on the back of it. I throw on a light pair of jeans that has a few rips. I asked my mom about that and she said it was the style now a days. I just nodded because I liked it. I pulled out a pair of boots and a smile was on my face. Austin had laughed because he said every girl had a pair of those boots. This generation had a weird fascination with them.

Those were his words. It was his funny to see his confused, but intrigued face. I put them on just to bother him.

My hair was fairly dry buy now. I had gotten in cut. There was a small scar going straight across my forehead and to avoid questioning I decided to get bangs. I threw my hair up into a ponytail with my bangs out. I walked down the steps of my new home, well new to my memory-less brain, and saw my dad cooking breakfast. He told me that he learned to cook since I couldn't remember how to. I would have to learn.

I ate bacon and eggs with him in a comfortable silence. He got up to leave for his job. He knew that Austin was picking me up since I don't remember how to drive. I felt too powerless and had to depend on people. For some reason, my brain knew that wasn't the real me. I heard a knock at the door and went to go open it. I grabbed my backpack along the way. There stood Austin in a black sweatshirt and jeans. His green shoes were really standing out. I think they were called converses.

"Hello," He said with a voice that wasn't his. I think it was called an accent. I just rolled my eyes and smiled. I closed the door behind me and we proceeded to his. His dad mad a lot of money and was making more because he was treating me. He would sell results to other doctors. It really didn't bother as long as it wasn't anything too personal. He assured me it wasn't.

Austin car was a sleek, black one. I didn't know the model.

"It's an Audi," I heard him say. I guess he saw me studying the car. I got in the front seat while he got behind the wheel and we were off. He still hadn't noticed my boots. I was off my crutches since my leg was heeling rapidly because of my physical therapy in Arizona. It was very painful, but allowed me to walk by myself sooner. I tried to memorize the small town of Forks as best as I could, because when I learned how to drive again, I knew where I was going.

"Hey would you like to go to my house afterschool?" Austin asked.

"Yea, sure," I said. I was really curious to what it looked like. From what Austin described to me was that it looked like a big tree house, but for me to understand, I had to look up what a tree house looks like. We made our way into the school parking lot and every student in the school had their eyes on the parking lot.

My mind hadn't registered any familiarity in these peoples faces, but it was too be expected. Austin parked his car and we got out. I heard gasps coming from all directions and I blushed at the attention. It was making me uncomfortable. Austin sensed this and pulled me into a hug. I leaned gratefully into it.

**EPOV**

Today was the first day of school and I couldn't help but wonder if Bella was going to be there. No one knew where she went for the summer. She just disappeared. And I knew it was my fault. No one had said it was, but I knew. Our friendship had gone downhill once she confessed her feelings for me. I didn't feel the same way. I was in love with Tanya from the first sight I saw her. She was beautiful and that held me captive.

This summer was not one of my best. Tanya was very demanding but still held my love. Everyone was moody and sad around the house especially when Tanya came over. Alice threw her looks of disgust as well as Rosalie. My mom couldn't even stand her and that was very unlike Esme. We all got into my Volvo. Tanya would be meeting us there.

According to Forks gossip, there was a new kid today. He was 's kid that went to boarding school. They had a lot of money, but not as much as us. We pulled into the parking lot. I could sense the other people just waiting for the new kid to arrive. I got out of the car and Tanya walked up to me and kissed me. We leaned on my car to wait for the new kid's arrival.

It wasn't long before a black Audi pulled into the school's parking lot. People were just gawking at the car. It was a funny sight and to be expected.

But what I didn't expect was for Bella Swan to come out of the car. Everyone gasped including me and my family. The new kid came out and he immediately went to Bella who had her head down and was blushing. Same old Bella. He hugged her and without hesitation she responded. Her clothes were different. They were similar to the ones that she wore to the first day of school last year. Once she and Alice became friends, she was forced to wear fashionable clothes. I didn't blame her. You wouldn't mess with her.

My whole family walked up to her even though Tanya was a little reluctant.

**BPOV**

I let go of Austin and saw a group of people coming towards me. They probably were some old friends from before the accident. I was frustrated she couldn't remember me. They were all beautiful. A girl with strawberry blonde hair smirked at me. I was taken aback. She had a skirt that was very short. Was that in style too? Her tank top was very tight too her body and she had on pink heels. Wasn't she cold? I was freezing.

The guy beside her, her boyfriend I guess, was gorgeous. His bronze hair and green eyes stood out from this small town. I took all my strength to tear my eyes away from him. There was a short petite girl next to me. She had a navy blue dress on and gray tight pants. _Leggings_, my brain remembered. Her hair was straight and black. Her flats matched her outfits according to my mind. Next to her was a blonde mail.

He was not as beautiful as the first guy I saw, but a perfect addition to this group. The girl beside him had many similarities. The blonde hair and piercing blue eyes gave them there resemblance. She had on a long sleeve shirt that fell off the shoulder. There was a tank top under it. She had on jeans with high heeled boots that came up to her boots. She had her hand intertwined with a guy that was massive.

His muscles were the side of his head, but something in my brain told me not to be afraid. Austin still had his arm wrapped around me, but it was tense. I had to admit that this group was pretty intimidating.

The shortest girl of the group came bouncing to me and said, "Hi, Bella!"

So I must have been friends with her, but my automatic response came out, "Who are you?"


	4. Chapter 4

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!

"Who are you?"

The whole group looked shocked. The short one looked like she was about to cry. And that's when I registered that my question could have been taken offensive.

"Wait no I'm sorry, I just don't remember you," I said with as much sincerity I could muster up. Their expressions were all confused. It was comical. I could feel Austin chuckling beside me.

"What do you mean you don't remember us?" She asked. Her voice confused.

"Well to make things short, I had an accident and all my memories have seemed to erase," I said quite fast, but they caught every word.

"She is lying," The girl in the too-tight clothes said. Wait? What? I was lying? Why would I be lying?

"So if you forgot everything, how come you still in the same grade as us. Shouldn't you not remember what you have been taught in school?" The blonde goddess asked.

"Well my amnesia is a rare one. I remember what I have been taught, but I don't remember being taught." Some of them nodded in understanding.

"I'm sorry but what are your names? I feel weird having a conversation to total strangers," I said. For some reason, Adonis with bronze hair winced. The girl in front of me bounced up and down.

"Ok well, I'm Alice and this is Tanya, Edward, Jasper, Rosalie, and Emmett." I nodded my head in understanding. I could feel myself forgetting their names because of my horrible memory.

"I might ask your names again because I learned that I had a horrible memory." They nodded and the bell rang.

"C'mon Bella. Lets get our schedule," Austin whispered into my arms. He grabbed my hand and we made our way to the building that said main office.

**EPOV**

The news was shocking. She didn't remember who I was. I knew everything about her, but all the sincere conversations I had with her were erased in her mind. She had no idea who I was, who any of us were. Everyone I could tell was sad for her in a way. Not knowing your memories means you don't know yourself. And that guy she was with. I had an uneasy feeling about him. What if he corrupted her? From their body language, he had her around his finger.

I could tell Tanya didn't believe a word she said. I had my doubts as well. Did she just make this up so the awkwardness was gone? I knew the real answer. She couldn't have made this up. She was a bad liar. This would have been to big of a scheme to pull off. Tanya and I walked to our first class together. I got looks of envy from boys walking down the hall and I saw a few girl shoot glares at Tanya. Tanya looked smug.

We sat down and waited for the teacher. The teacher came in and started to talk about regular first day stuff. Not a few minutes later, Bella walked in with Austin.

**BPOV**

After we got our schedules, we made our way to my first class. Austin was dropping me off since he was really protective of me. I didn't mind. Austin had informed the secretary of my condition and she already paged all my teachers as well. We walked hand in hand. Other people were whispering, but this was normal for us. I walked into the classroom with Austin. He turned around and hugged me and I hugged him back. I was going to be alone for an hour surrounded by many kids my age.

"I will pick you up outside the class," he whispered. I nodded and detached myself from him. He gave me one last look before turning around and going back outside. I turned around and noticed that everyone had seen our little exchange. Thankfully the teacher didn't say anything and directed me towards a chair in the back. I saw Tanya and Edward were in the same smile. She gave him a peck on the lips and turned back to smirk at me.

I beamed back. They were a good couple. I was happy for them, but then why did I feel like someone punched me in the stomach? Tanya seemed confused by my reaction. I sat in my assigned seat and the teacher went on. It wasn't long before the bell rang and I hurriedly grabbed my stuff.

I saw a blonde male a bright blue eyes walk up to me. He had a dog like a puppy. It was cute.

"Hey Bella," He said. So I guess he was my friend to. I held my automatic response in and smiled at him.

"I was wondering if you wanted to go out on a date?" I could feel my eyebrows go together in confusion.

"What's a date?" I asked.

"Well, it is when two people go out together and talk and have a good time," he answered as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. To normal people it was, but I wasn't normal since the incident. Something tells me I wasn't before the incident either. My mind started to think.

He looked like a nice guy, but I didn't want to go out alone with him. Something just didn't feel right.

"Um no thank you," I whispered in a small voice. I grabbed my stuff and went out the door. I walked out to see Austin leaning against the wall.

"What took you so long?" he asked. I informed him of what happened and he seemed mad, but there was amusement in his eyes. The rest of the morning was spent Austin taking me to class or picking me up from class. I had class with my supposed friends that I had newly met this morning, but I had short conversations, especially Edward. For some reason, my body felt awkward.


	5. Chapter 5

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!

We walked to the cafeteria. Austin immediately took us to the lunch line. I wasn't really that hungry so I bought and apple lemonade. We paid for the food and I heard my name being yelled out. The black haired pixie was waving her arms, indicating for me to sit down with them. I think her name was Alice. We walked to the table to find two empty seats.

We sat down and the whole table wanted to know more about my condition. It wasn't upsetting to talk about the illness that I have.

"Well like I said my amnesia is a rare one. Apparently the side of my brain that holds memories had taken the most impact. They fixed it so I could store new memories, but they have no idea if my old ones can come back. During my time in the hospital, I was visited constantly by doctors and therapists because I was one of the few that had this amnesia.," I explained.

"So how did you get into the car accident?" Edward asked.

"Well apparently, I was walking and crossed the street and failed to see the car coming towards me. The guy who was driving his car said his brakes weren't working probably. At the last minute they magically worked, but the car still hit me." I lifted my arm up and showed them the scar on my forehead."

The big muscular guy, Emmett, looked really engrossed in my scar. It was funny to see his face.

What's that?" Edward asked pointed to my arm. Suddenly I remembered that this was the arms that held my scar. I dropped it quickly. They were waiting for an answer. I decided to give it to them. Maybe they could tell me why I did it.

"Um apparently, I had cut myself a little while before the incident. The cut was pretty deep that it left a scar."

Edward went rigid in his seat, as well as everyone else. Tanya had an evil glint in her eyes. That really scared me. The bell rand before I could say something else. My afternoon classes passed by without incident. We got into Austin's car before we had a chance to say goodbye to the Cullens.

**EPOV**

Bella cut herself. And it was my entire fault. Did she love me that much that she decided to do self harm? Now I was immensely glad that she lost her memories and past. She would undoubtly hate me if she knew that I was the one that caused her to do that. I dropped Rosalie and Jasper at their house and the rest of us went to the house. I walked up to the house and was immediately hit with a scent of Esme's cooking.

Emmett being Emmett ran to the kitchen screaming, "Food!" I couldn't help but chuckle. I went up to Carlisle study to speak to him. I knew he didn't have a shift at the hospital today. I knocked and waited for my father to tell me to proceed. I walked in when he did.

Carlisle was sitting down looking at me with expectant eyes.

"Did you ever hear about a girl who lost her memories?" I asked him.

"Well now that you mention it, I did. Apparently she has a rare amnesia. Her memories are completely erased, but she still knows what she was taught."

"That girl happens to be Bella," I whispered softly. His eyes were wide. He knew that Bella had expressed her actual feelings towards me and how I didn't feel the same way.

"But what you didn't know, what that she cut herself. Because of me. I caused her so much pain that she needed physical pain to feel some sort of release. I just feel horrible and a complete monster," I said. Tears were threatening to spill over as I pictured the scar on Bella's wrist.

"Edward, stop. You are not a monster. It wasn't your fault that Bella felt the need to push herself that far. You weren't controlling what she was doing. You cannot blame yourself for this. Plus there is a very slim chance that her old memories could be recovered from what I heard. There was so much damaged. Plus, she has a very good therapist to help her if they do return," Carlisle reassured me. He always knew what to say. I nodded, silently excepting his plea for me to understand.

It wasn't long before Esme called us for dinner. My thoughts and worries didn't erase but they were at ease. For now.

**BPOV**

We pulled up to Austin's house. He was right. It did look like a big tree house. There were a lot of trees covering the house, so it didn't really look that big from the outside. The inside was huge. He gave me a tour and he showed me all the secret compartments and there was a huge amount of stairs. We did our homework and just around for awhile.

"This is a huge house for just two people," I stated. Austin just shrugged.

"Well, my dad is getting married again. So it won't be just the two of us," He sighed. Austin's mother did when he was younger, so he didn't remember much about her

"To who?" I asked. He didn't tell me about this. The news obviously unsettled him by the way his facial expression turned into discomfort.

"I don't know and I don't care," he said, effectively putting an end to this conversation. And I did ask anymore questions. I knew that was all I was getting out of him.

Austin always had his guard up. He never put it down when he was with me. Yes, he hugged me and comforted me, but that was only _for me._ There was no emotional kind of aspect to it for him. I wasn't disturbed by it at all. Yes sometimes he guard did come down when he thought I wasn't looking. I saw how when he looked at a particular object the pain chose it's time to rein in his eyes.

It was all very easy to see. All you need was to look.

Then there was me. I didn't want to become emotionally attached to someone. I felt like I would just disappoint the person in the end. I would spend too much time looking for myself and not putting enough into it. That wasn't fair. My body and brain had come to the conclusion that I might be alone for the rest of my life. Of course physically I could be with someone, but my mind would always be looking for pieces in my lost puzzle.

The night was almost over and Austin decided to take me home. Several minutes later, we arrived at my house. I got out of the car with a 'see you later' to Austin. My dad was home, his eyes fixed to the television watching some sport my mind couldn't remember. I grunted in frustration.

I would always be that girl. The girl who can't remember anything. I was growing frustrated by the day. It wasn't fair that people's mind automatically could think of something. I had to wait countless seconds for my mind to finally come up with the name. I was like a street less map. I didn't know where I was going, but more importantly, where I have been.

I was stuck in the middle of nowhere.


	6. Chapter 6

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!

I woke up to the rainy clouds that belong to this small town. It didn't take long for me to stop staring at the ceiling and for me to get into the small bathroom. I showered and let my brain think. I showered and washed my hair. I could tell my dad had left already.

I changed into what Austin called 'the shy girl tee' and some dark jeans. I put on some dark red converses and a leather jacket. I let my hair dry and it naturally came out curled at the end. I went downstairs and grabbed a granola bar.

I heard what was now going to become a familiar knocking. I grabbed my backpack and went to go open the door. And there stood Austin in a white v-neck and grey cardigan. His dark jeans and black kicks suited him well. We said our morning greeting and headed over to the black car. I already forgot the brand.

It didn't take long to arrive to the parking lot. Again we got the stares, but I sensed something different. Immediately, I tugged on the sleeve of my leather jacket. Austin parked and he seemed oblivious. That was something that frustrated me. He didn't seem aware of the world around; of the dangers that lurked around.

I got out of the car and instantly people where pointing fingers. There eyes trailing down to my hands. Where ever I walked, there were whispers. My emotions were identifiable at the moment. My brain couldn't work fast enough. Tears were spilling onto my cheeks; my mind registering too late to stop them. I was breathing heavily oblivious to Austin and the group I met yesterday calling my name.

And then my world went black.

**EPOV**

I drove to the school with my family and the Hales in the car. I had a feeling something bad was going to happen. Alice was shifting uncomfortably and I could tell that she was feeling it as well. I parked in my usual place and saw Bella and the new kid come out of their car as well.

This time kids were pointing at her and whispering. Their eyes locked onto her hands. Her face seemed expressionless. It all happened to quickly then.

She started breathing heavily. Her body begging her to have some oxygen. Tears were rolling down her cheeks. The noise around me just kept getting louder by the second. My family and I rushed to her. We were screaming her name frantically and she showed no signs of noticing our presence. The new kid wasn't making much progress either.

Her eyes rolled back and she swayed a little and started to fall. I was quick to catch her. I scooped her in my arms; bridal style. I ran to the nurse's office. Ignoring the pleasure of having Bella in my arms. I was just worried about her right now. The world disappeared. Global warming was no longer a problem. It was only me and Bella. I guess the new kid was in front of me and was now holding the front door of the nurse's office. I laid her down on one of the small beds and sat beside her. I brushed her brown locks out of her face. I traced the scar that was on her forehead.

I couldn't help but think that I put it there. As well as the other one that was on her wrist. It all clicked then. The whispers and pointing.

Someone told everyone else that Bella had cut herself. But there were plenty of people who cut themselves in Forks high. There was a whole table of them and they were not afraid to show of their scars. So why did people decide to release their inhuman ways on Bella.

"You love her." The new kid said. I didn't even notice he was in the room. I turned to look at him. One legs was up against the wall.

"The way you look at her. It said it all," He whispered.

"How would you know what love is?" I asked. But it surprised me how I didn't automatically denied what he said.

"When you look at her, don't you think she is an angel? Don't you automatically point out the bad in yourself? It seems the things that you did wrong used to be insignificant and now their just mocking you. Now imagine one thing. Imagine if she was not on this Earth," he told me. And I did imagine. The pain that coursed through me was unbearable. The meaning to live was gone.

Was this how Bella felt when I rejected her? Was this how she felt when she met Tanya? I was a demon to have to put her through that. And it was easy to see that I did love her. I just always assumed that Bella would always be there. I could experience the world and she would always be there.

But what if she wasn't? I didn't think about that. It would kill me to not see the crimson blush or to see the chocolate brown eyes. To see her body so still and pale would just end my life.

"How do you know this?" I asked. It was funny how my family would always tell me I was blind because they could see I loved Bella, but I couldn't. Yet, this stranger in only a matter of words let me see the reason for my existence.

"Because I was in love once. She looked just like Bella, too. Her name was Charlotte. She was my best friend. I knew she was in love with me, but we kept our friendship. She saw me go on dates and hid the hurt pretty well. If it weren't for her sleep talking, I would have been convinced she got over me. And then there was the car accident. But unlike Bella, she didn't make it. And that's when I knew I loved her. Of course I didn't know it at the time, but I always figured she would have waited in the wings. I was a complete mess. I didn't eat and barely spoke. And at her funeral, I broke down. She was gone. I wouldn't get to see the smile she used to give me when I brought her mint chocolate chip ice cream. Or the dimple that was on her right cheek. Or how she was just put her hands in her hair and just massages her head with her eyes close. Her heart would be no longer beating and her chest wouldn't rise and fall with every breath she took," he said, gently. Tears were falling free from his face. He made no move to stop them.

"Before her accident, Bella and I were the best of friends. Little did I know she was falling in love with me. At the time, my mind only processed her as a friend. She told me her feelings and I told her mine. When I met Tanya, Bella went away. I started spending more time with Tanya to take my mind off of Bella, but she was still there. I was starting to worry where she was. She left and didn't contact anyone. It then she came to the first day of school. It seemed at that time that she would always be back," I said to him.

"But then she didn't remember anything. And I couldn't deny I was hurt. All the meaningful conversations, the inside jokes were gone; well at least to her. And when she told us about the scar on the wrist, I was crushed. I wanted to die right then and there. I didn't deserve to live and inflict so much pain on an angel. And to me it wasn't fair. I had a perfect family and a normal teenage life. While Bella doesn't even remember what a normal teenager life consists of." The new kid looked shocked at how similar the stories were.

I felt Bella beginning to stir. She opened her eyelids to reveal her beautiful eyes. I couldn't deny it for much longer. I knew I was in deep.


	7. Chapter 7

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!

I felt my eyes flutter open. My dull, boring brown ones were met with bright, emerald green ones. _Edward_, my mind recognized. There was a dull ache in my back. I was laying on something hard and uncomfortable. I sat up and I could feel Edward's eyes on me the whole time. I also noticed that Austin was leaning against the wall. His eyes were bloodshot, but he still had the smile on his face. And this time it was no longer guarded.

The beginning of the day came rushing back to me and I groaned at the sensation. Edward I could tell was alarmed.

"Bella are you okay?" He asked worriedly. I vaguely nodded my head yes.

"Do you know why you fainted?" He continued to question me.

"Everything was going to fast. My mind couldn't process it quickly enough," I told him. My voice was husky; like I hadn't spoken for days.

Alice decided that it her time to make an appearance because she burst through the doors looking ready to kill. I wrapped my arms around myself. I was uncomfortable.

**EPOV**

I haven't seen Alice ever this mad before. She gave me a pointed look that said she needed to talk to me. I reluctantly got up. Bella was feeling uncomfortable and I wanted to comfort her. But I got up and let Austin do the job. I walked out the office with Alice leading the way and closed the door behind me. Finally we stopped walking once we were down the hallway.

"Alice, why are you mad?" I asked cautiously. I didn't know if she was mad at me and I definitely didn't want to add fuel to the fire.

"Well when Bella fainted, I noticed that people were looking at her hands. At first I was confused and then it all made sense. They were looking at her wrists. But there are lot of emo kids who do that here, so it can't be a big deal. But being good actress came to my advantage and I went up to the biggest gossiper in town, Jessica, and asked what all the ruckus was about. And you know what she told me?!" At fist she whispering, but her voice level went up with every syllable.

"What?" I asked quietly. Alice was scaring me, but this information was vital because I wanted to know why there treating Bella this way.

"She said that Bella was so hopelessly in love with you that she tried to kill herself by cutting her wrists and she came up with this whole forgetting about you stuff to try to steal from Tanya," She shouted. " And that's when I started to think. The only people to know Bella cut herself were us and Tanya. Of course, none of us would say anything, but I most definitely know that Tanya would!"

I was shocked at the newly discovered information. I had no doubt that it was Tanya. I saw something in her eyes yesterday. My first reaction was trouble, but I shrugged it off. I was shocked and hurt. How could she betray me like this? Bella was my best friend and meant a lot to me. I knew Tanya was always jealous because she would never understand the relationship between Bella and I. But I would do that to her if she had a guy best friend.

I was furious beyond belief. I wanted Tanya out of my life. I didn't even want to see her face anymore. My mind pictured her one more time. I was immediately repulsed. How couldn't I see that she fake from the beginning, how there was nothing true to her? She was never being herself; just a product of peer pressure. I let my anger die down before I went back to Bella. I quickly told Alice my thoughts and she was glad I came to my senses.

Bella was out the door before I had a chance to get there. First period was over and I would immediately be changing my seat tomorrow. Anyone of the hormonal boys would gladly give there's up to sit next to plastic Tanya.

**BPOV**

As soon as I felt well enough, I walked to my second period class. Austin and Edward kept asking me non stop if I was okay, but I reassured them every time. The morning passed by quickly for me. But people still whispered and pointed. I wasn't dumb. They all knew about the scar on my wrist. I heard some rumors. But Austin told me rumors weren't true. So I didn't believe them.

I walked in the lunchroom with Austin and I got pizza with a diet soda. All this attention was making me hungry. We walked to the Cullen's table. Everyone was there except Tanya. Once I sat down they bombarded me with questions, I just laughed it off and they seemed to relax. I made some conversation with Rosalie. Her hair was different from yesterdays. Instead of the pin straight, she had curls. Her purple plaid shirt accented beautifully on her skin and her jeans were snug and fit on her legs. But my eyes bugged out when they saw how high her heels were.

It wasn't too long before Tanya. She was wearing black tube top and white shorts. She had had on black wedge heels. Her hair was in a ponytail, but slightly volumized. Seriously, wasn't this girl cold?! I saw the whole table stiffen. My face turned into one of confusion.

"Eddie!" she yelled and ran toward Edward. He immediately pushed her away and my eyes widened in surprise. But I couldn't say that I wasn't pleased.

"Tanya, we're over," he said to her. It was quiet so everyone in the cafeteria heard. He sat back down and she looked surprised and hurt.

"It's because of you!" She pointed at me. "You slut. He was mine and you took him. You bitch!" Tears gathered in my eyes. But my mind was smart enough to let them fall. I heard a scraping against the floor and saw that Alice was walking towards Tanya. She pulled her hand back and sent it flying forward.

Slap! Alice had just smacked her! I couldn't hold in my laughter and the rest of the table joined. Tanya ran out the door with a girl Jessie? Jennifer? I already forgot her name. We talked for the rest of the lunch period like any of this did not happen. Alice told me she was going to take me shopping. For some reason I was scared but I agreed. From what I saw, she was a very fashionable person.

Her off the shoulder printed shirt, skinny jeans, and heels showed me that. Her hair was in soft, short curls. My mind told me she was a beauty expert.

Lunch soon came to an end and the rest of the afternoon flew by. I was leaning against Austin's car waiting for him to come out of class. Edward walked up to me.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Well, Austin invited the gang and me to hang out later and I came to get the address," he responded. I nodded my head in understanding. Austin was there before I had a chance to reply. He gave Edward the address and we were all set.

I watched Edward walked back to his car. My brain was telling me my emotions. Disappointment and longing? That couldn't be right. My brain was going wacky on my today. Then again, when wasn't it?


	8. Chapter 8

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT!

We got to Austin's house pretty fast and we were already doing our homework. The Cullens and Hales had yet to arrive. We finished our homework and Austin ordered pizza. I want so bad to ask why he was less guarded now. Sure sometimes, the smile would falter, but it was on rare occasions. I didn't want to pry, but I was dying to know.

The doorbell echoed through the entire house. It made me jump and I saw that Austin went to go get it. Austin's room was more like an apartment. He had several doors leading to a living room, a hot tub (complete with a sauna), and a mini kitchen. I heard booming footsteps that could only belong to Emmett.

They all came in the room and were in an awe. They were obviously thinking it would appear smaller than this. I cleared my throat and they stopped their ogling. Austin and I were trying to stifle the laughter. I let out a small laugh escape and Edward looked like he was dazed.

"Hi," I said. He nodded back with a crooked smile. I was immediately hypnotized by the beauty. I averted my eyes to the books that were on Austin's bed. Austin gave them a tour and I decided to stay back and watch TV. I was watching television when I felt weight on the bed beside me. I looked up. It was Edward.

"Hello," he greeted me. I muted the television and turned to him with curious eyes. He seemed to get what I was asking.

"I got lost," he answered sheepishly. I grinned. That was very easy to do here.

"I do it all the time," I told him secretly. He grinned at me.

"You know before you got in the car accident, I was your best friend," He said. I turned to him with eager eyes. Austin told me that best friends were people who knew everything about you. But his expression confused me at first because it was sad. I asked him if best friends were supposed to make you sad. He said no, but the confusion never cleared up.

A conversation started between Edward and I. We talked about what we like to do. What I liked. They all seemed familiar. He would talk about some memories. Some of them were funny and we would spend what felt like forever laughing. In the back of my head, I was aware that his family didn't come back and it's already passed a long time.

We heard throat clearing and turned our heads in that direction. And there stood his family with smug smiles. I had no reason why their smiles where in fact smug. The little pixie was bouncing up and down happiness. Damn, I didn't know that witnessing laughter cause so much happiness.

Finally the smug smiles were gone, and we all were in conversations. Some of them were embarrassing for me, even though I didn't remember it. Edward's face was unhealthy shade of red. I couldn't even blush like that. They shared some stories about Emmett, but he didn't look unfazed. We ordered pizza and ate.

Austin cleared his throat to speak," Well I could tell Bella here is dying to learn how to drive again. I was going to teach her, but I could tell that it would help her relax if you guys were teaching her as well. So would you teach Bella how to drive _again?_" They al looked eager.

"All of us are not going to fit in your Audi, so I suggest you and Edward could teach her. You guys are the better drivers," Alice suggested. It looked like Emmett would have protested but Rose hit him in the stomach. I was confused at the exchange. We got up and went into the garage. I noticed Austin's car went in that direction. The whole gang wasn't far behind.

"Okay, get in the driver seat," Austin instructed. I did what he said and was surprised when Edward got in the front seat and Austin in the back. I put on my seatbelt on. My mind remembered the feeling of being in a driver's seat. The others were waiting outside the garage. They were going to watch.

Edward and Austin explained all the little pictures and the letters. I demanded my mind to remember and surprisingly it did. They explained what the gas did and the brake did as well. Finally I was ready to hit the road. I was scared out of my mind.

I put the key into what I now know was the ignition and put the car in drive.

"Okay, press your foot slowly down on the gas," Austin told me, his hands making movements. The garage door was open and I gently pressed on the gas. The car smoothly went forward. The nervousness was replaced with excitement. I knew I had a big ol' grin on my face right now.

Austin and Edward directed me as we got onto the road. It was clear so I didn't have to worry about hitting other people. By the time we finished, I had done turns and stop perfectly. All I had to perfect was parallel parking.

When I got back to the oversized tree house, I heard cheering in the back round. I was proud of myself.

It was getting late and I had to get back. Austin seemed to know this too and ran in the house to get my books and stuff.

"Hey Bella!" I whipped my head towards Edward. He was jogging towards me. My body tensed up in anticipation. I was confused of my reaction.

"Yes," I asked. He was standing a foot away from me now.

"Well Austin asked me If I could teach you how to parallel park tomorrow because he had to do something. I was wondering if you would be comfortable with that?" He asked. Why wouldn't I be comfortable? But I bit my tongue and agreed to let him teach me. He seemed to beam at the fact and I couldn't help but to return the smile.

Austin came out and he let me drive to my house. We got there and I said goodbye to him. I told Charlie goodnight and didn't stay long enough to hear a response. My mind was too busy thinking about Edward.

I couldn't register the emotion that made your heart beat wildly, made your senses even more aware, fire to course through your veins, and for any coherent thought to disappear. My mind kept suggesting nausea, but I knew that it couldn't be right. I let my mind wander on today. It was the best day of my life that I could remember.

I quickly fell asleep. And all I could picture was Edward. How strange…


End file.
